Okay, we've got a turtle.
It's been a week with no response from anyone. Seems like he'd just crawl right back out of Christina's pond if we tried to put him there. ...And I'm attached. So I'm not sure how I'd feel about a "hey, anyone want a turtle?" post on Craigslist, considering how he came to me in the first place.
(Yes I am--I'd be suspicious of askers and guilty about giving him up or prying about living-conditions-to-come.)
So, we committed. We have a turtle.
He doesn't have a name yet; we think his surname is Tortuga (Spanish for Turtle, and just an awesome sounding name as it is), so for now we're calling him Don Tortuga and "TURTLETURTLETURTLE!" but we'll see about a proper first name soon.
Finally figured out a reasonable spot for him, where *I* can get to him and clean him, since this is on me. I spent the day outfitting him with a tank and appropriate turtle accoutrement and plants and pretties, and he seems pleased. He's still in the process of exploring, but at least now he can hide and swim. He still hasn't figured out the basking thing, but maybe he'll get there soonish, now that he has a light to encourage him up there.
There are some pictures from his previous home (especially of him playing Headless Horseman and making Sleepy Face), but there will be proper, well-lit pictures from his new home, soon, and you can all see the handsome tortuga!